


lance vs. the homo sapiens agenda

by fljghtlessbirds



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Background Hunk/Shay, Background Shiro/Adam, Coming Out, Fluff, Gay Keith, High School, Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, bi lance, broganes, simon vs the homo sapiens agenda au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-03-27 21:19:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13889352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fljghtlessbirds/pseuds/fljghtlessbirds
Summary: lance mcclain is just like every other student at the garrison. well, for the most part. he has a huge ass secret. nobody knows that he's bisexual. except for red.





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is based upon the book 'simon vs. the homo sapiens agenda'. if you haven't read it, please do!! obviously a lot of this fic is going to be inspired from the book, but i will be branching out from both the book, the movie and the show itself. also everyone is 17, including allura, but shiro and coran are older! this chap is short because i just wanted to test the waters i guess, if it does well chapters will definitely be way longer. thanks for reading <3

it took lance a few minutes to comprehend what was happening. lotor, the most self righteous, rich, entitled, arrogant, and any other fucking insult that was written in the dictionary, had him pinned down outside of his car, and was blackmailing lance.

lance approached lotor a few minutes ago. he was attempting to stand nonchalantly against the rear of lance’s car, hands tucked awkwardly in the pockets of his khakis. he had immediately known something was up, since lotor is too conceited to even look at lance, let alone take part of his precious time to talk to him after school. he thought he was going to get his ass kicked or something. getting blackmailed was definitely not on the list of possibilities. 

they had already initiated the awkward small talk, asking each other about their days and such. lance joked about lotor's ass ruining his new paint job on his car, then questioned why he was there in the first place, and lotor effortlessly avoided the question. after a beat of silence, he spit it out. “so, i noticed you at the library yesterday,” the smug prick started. “you were at one of the computers.” 

“yeah?”

“yeah.”

“okay...” lance was confused, and he just wanted to go home. he moved to open the passenger door, when lotor abruptly grabbed his wrist. lance tried to shake him off. he wouldn’t let go. “dude, seriously? you’re blocking me from  _ my  _ car?”

“i read your emails, mcclain,” lotor said quietly, loosening his death grip. “not deliberately. after you exited the library, i tried logging onto my email and your account was there. you should probably log out next time.”

the last part kind of felt like a threat, and lance can literally feel his heart fall out of his ass. all his emails, his secrets,  _ red’s secrets;  _ lotor knew about everything. lotor, the son of two of the most powerful adults in the entire city, knew some of the most private details of lance’s life that not even hunk knew. like the fact that he’s fucking bisexual, for example. he swallowed thickly as he quickly thought of what to say. “why would you read them? it’s not like when you opened gmail my personal emails were just sitting there. you clicked on them. and then  _ deliberately  _ read them.” lance was furious.

“true. but we can’t go back now, can we?” the pair locked eyes and lotor exhaled sharply. “look, it’s fine, mcclain. i’m not going to show anyone. i have a distant cousin who’s gay. gay people are great! and bisexuals are amazing!” 

lance didn’t acknowledge the typical ignorance towards other sexualities that comes with straight people, but rather the sentence beforehand. “i’m sorry, show anyone? did you...” lance trailed off, a frown forming on his brow. if his heart could sink any further than his ass, he was sure it was at the center of the earth by now. it was probably being burnt to a crisp by molten lava. that would definitely explain the burning in his chest.

lotor smiled sheepishly. “print screenshots?” before lance could get a word in, he continues. “anyways, i know you’re friends with allura and i —”

“you’re not serious. you’re not seriously asking me to be your wingman in exchange for you not leaking very personal details about my life. details that are none of your business.” 

lotor has a look painted on his face that makes lance feel nauseous. if red were here he would say that nauseated is grammatically correct. “i just think that we can help each other out. just think about it, lance.”

with that, lotor walked away, leaving lance alone. on the car ride home, he tried to not pay attention to the burning in his eyes and the huge lump caught in his throat. once he was safely in his driveway, he turned the key out of the ignition. he slammed his head onto the steering wheel, a loud, annoying beep emerging and that made lance even more upset. he smacked his hands onto the horn a few more times out of anger, and then cried for 20 minutes until he saw his mother’s headlights shining in his rearview mirror. 

* * *

from: lesslikealake.morelikeamoat@gmail.com

to: RedEmoLonerKid1023@gmail.com

october 15, 2017 at 5:01 p.m.

subject: help

red, i hope you had a better day than me, which can’t be too hard because mine was an epic pile of shit. i can’t really talk about it but dear god, i really want to. and of course i can’t tell you why i can’t. this is terrible.

i guess this is as good a time as any to change the subject to literally anything, so here’s a question i’ve been dying to ask you: what is up with your 2006 myspace-esque email address?

—lanza

 

from: RedEmoLonerKid1023@gmail.com

to: lesslikealake.morelikeamoat@gmail.com

october 15, 2017 at 5:32 p.m.

subject: help

I’m sorry about your shit pile of a day, Lanza. I completely understand about not being able to tell me. You’re not required to tell me every single fact about you, even though you pretty much do anyway.

I had a pretty good day. There’s a lot of excitement buzzing around school about homecoming and Halloween, and even though I hate football, going to the games is fun. I mean, I hate crowds but there’s something about football games or concerts that kind of make me forget about being anxious. 

On the other hand, I really do love Halloween, and hearing people talk about their costumes is something I love. Not sure why, since I hate dressing up. Maybe it’s the fact that it makes other people happy. 

As for my email, that’s what everyone calls me so I just decided to embrace it. Pretty sure Emo Loner Kid is my middle name by now. Red is just my favorite color and Emo Loner Kid felt like a lot to type, so to make it easier on everyone I put red in the front.

As for your email, I may have done some shameful Googling and found a whole lot of pictures of water, lakes, and moats, but also lyrics to a very depressing song. Maybe I should start calling you Blue.

I hope this very lengthy email has made you briefly forget about your shitty day, and I hope that tomorrow is better. You deserve it.

—Red


	2. two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof long time no see  
> shiro being confirmed as a Canon Gay made me come back to this !!  
> enjoy and as always, feedback is appreciated <3

keith kogane clicked the ‘post’ button with one tap of his mouse, and he immediately regretted it. he groaned and ran his fingers through his long, dark hair, tugging at the top of his scalp as he did so. keith leaned back in his computer chair and stared at his bedroom ceiling. he blinked in disbelief, hoping, praying, that he didn’t just do that and this was all some crazy nightmare. but no, the ‘your post was successfully published to garrisonsecrets!’ message at the top of his browser window was telling him very differently. he sat up and rested his elbows on his desk, head now in his hands as he looked at his computer screen through his fingers. fuck. like clockwork, shiro must have somehow heard keith’s troubles from downstairs, because he was now knocking on his door. keith quickly refreshed the page so his post was out of view. shiro wouldn’t have known he wrote it, but he wasn’t taking chances. 

“keith?” shiro started, pushing the door ajar. “you okay?” he didn’t fully enter his room. he always respected keith’s privacy like that, no matter what the topic of conversation was. shiro lightly prodded him with reassuring words and his soft ‘dad voice’, as pidge called it, until keith inevitably caved as much as he comfortably could. 

“yeah, just...” his voice strained as he thought of a lie. “annoying homework.” 

shiro opened the door and leaned the right of his body against the doorframe, arms crossed and one of his eyebrows cocked. “it’s the second week of school, how annoying can it be?”

“oh, y’know, it’s stuff about my future and college and stuff. pretty annoying.” keith supplied, pursing his lips slightly.

shiro frowned, but nodded anyways. “okay. dinner’s ready.”

“be down in a minute.” keith swiveled his chair and turned back to his laptop. he switched tabs and refreshed his email, only to be greeted with about twenty emails already. suppressing another groan, he slammed it shut and went downstairs.

as he hit the bottom stair, he was greeted by laughter and the sizzling aswell of the aroma of delicious food being cooked. keith inhaled a sharp breath, and turned tail into the kitchen.

“hey, champ,” shiro said, making keith grimace at the use of the nickname. “five minutes and dinner is served.”

“i thought you said it was ready,” he took a seat on a stool at the breakfast island, and adam was to his right. shiro was across from them, palms face down on the counter. “and ‘champ?’ really? am i twelve?” adam chuckled.

shiro shot a look at his boyfriend before looking back at keith. “yes,  _ champ.  _ you got on the soccer team and i think you’re a shoo-in for captain this year!” he turned around to face the stove, turning off the heat. “and dinner is now officially served. adam, can you set the table?” adam curtly nodded, leaning over to give shiro a peck on the cheek as he stood up.

keith smiled softly at the domestic act. shiro saw keith looking at them and immediately turned beet red. he hated pda, and especially hated it when his little brother saw it. this only made keith’s smile grow wider, a laugh bubbling out of his chest. “you and adam have been dating for a year and a half and you seriously think i can’t handle a kiss on the cheek? god,  _ champ,  _ grow up!” 

shiro’s back was turned again, clearly hiding his embarrassment. “don’t test me, keith, i will spit in your food.” 

* * *

after dinner, keith retreated back to his room as shiro and adam decided to watch a movie. closing his door, he sighed deeply. he didn’t know why he couldn’t just tell shiro that he was gay. his brother was so happy and proud, but there is just a deep dark fear inside of him that had control over keith. it was saying that shiro would hate him, or that shiro would be the only person who accepted him but all his friends would leave him. who knows what the assholes at school would do.

but there was another entity that had control over keith; jealousy. he saw what shiro had with adam and so desperately wanted that to be him. happy, proud, in love. 

that was the real reason he submitted that stupid post. he wanted to know if there was someone out there just like him, that he wasn’t alone. he strode over to his laptop, plopping down in his computer chair and opening it. he refreshed his email again, and while there were a  _ lot  _ of messages, only one stood out to him. 

 

from: lesslikealake.morelikeamoat@gmail.com   
  
to: RedEmoLonerKid1023@gmail.com   
  
september 13, 2017 at 7:22 p.m.   
  
subject: hi

 

dear red*,

 

i’m just like everyone else. i have a ton of friends. we hang out together every chance we get, usually in my best friend’s basement. we play video games or we watch dumb 80s movies while eating too much junk food. and my personal favorite: sing along to musicals way too loudly on the ride to school. 

but the thing is, i’m not like everyone else. in fact, i have one huge ass secret. i’m bisexual. 

 

—lanza

*i hope it’s okay that i call you that. your name is a little long.

 

keith pinched the bridge of his nose, leaning back in his chair as he processed what he just read. someone at school, his school, was gay. sure,  _ lanza  _ was bi. but he liked  _ boys.  _ that was all that mattered. 

_ lanza.  _ immediately, lance mcclain popped into his head. not that he would ever admit it to anyone, but in freshman year he had a crush on lance. he was gorgeous; his sun kissed skin from vacationing in cuba during the summer accentuated his bright blue eyes. and his smile was breathtaking, along with his laugh. the crush only lasted for a week. he was figuring out a way to talk to this beautiful boy, but lance beat him to it. the second lance opened his mouth, he started to annoy the living shit out of keith, and he continued to do so at soccer practice for two hours straight. 

with a scoff and a shake of  his head, keith sat back up, fingers tapping erratically on his desk. he tossed around the idea of googling ‘lanza’ and figuring out what it meant, thinking maybe it would decode who it was. but then the sheer thought of finding out who lanza was terrified him; what if it was  _ lotor?  _ keith shivered, and he settled for googling the origins of his email address. a frown formed on his face as he skimmed the results. it was just a whole lot of pictures of castles with moats, and a few lakes. he scrolled down further, and figured—prayed—it was lyrics to a song called transatlanticism.

keith pressed play on the surprisingly sad song, but nonetheless a smile blossomed wide across his face as he listened to the lyrics. he switched tabs on his computer back to gmail, and clicked on ‘reply.’


End file.
